"Be thou strong therefore, and show thyself a man; and keep the charge of Jehovah thy God, to walk in his ways, to keep his statutes, and his commandments, and his ordinances, and his testimonies."
1 Kings 2:1-3
Our hearts reach out to the fathers who live in a world hostile to their role in our modern society. Today, more than ever, fathers need to be strong, and we need to encourage and support them in taking a godly role.
The Word of God is entirely clear that men and women are God's image-bearers (Genesis 1:27). They are equal in their standing before God (1 Peter 3:7; Galatians 3:28), their relationship with each other, and are fellow-heirs as Christians. The Bible also makes it clear that both men and women are equal concerning creation and redemption, thus sharing many things in common. They are also given different roles in marriage and in the church. God Himself chose distinctive roles for both male and female to fulfill His creation order and decree He gave to mankind (Genesis 1:28; 3:15-19). God has commanded men to serve as leaders in the marriage and the church. Likewise, He has commanded women to submit willingly to that headship as they labor together in their distinctive roles (Ephesians 5:23-24; 1 Peter 3:1-6; 1 Timothy 2:12; 3:1-13). Men and women are to fulfill their respective roles. God has called men to exercise their headship in a loving, gentle, respectful, and honoring manner (Eph. 5:25ff; 1 Peter 3:7). He likewise has called women to submit to that headship in a willing, gentle, respectful, and honoring way (Eph. 5:24, 33; 1 Peter 3:1-2). They are to carry their roles in a godly manner in their everyday situations. Unfortunately, many forces are working against them that must be overcome, and the antidote is found in the revealed Word of God (His grace), which instructs both men and women how to live soberly, righteously, and godly in this present world (Titus 2:11-14).
The Word of God is entirely clear that men and women are God's image-bearers (Genesis 1:27). They are equal in their standing before God (1 Peter 3:7; Galatians 3:28), their relationship with each other, and are fellow-heirs as Christians. The Bible also makes it clear that both men and women are equal concerning creation and redemption, thus sharing many things in common. They are also given different roles in marriage and in the church. God Himself chose distinctive roles for both male and female to fulfill His creation order and decree He gave to mankind (Genesis 1:28; 3:15-19). God has commanded men to serve as leaders in the marriage and the church. Likewise, He has commanded women to submit willingly to that headship as they labor together in their distinctive roles (Ephesians 5:23-24; 1 Peter 3:1-6; 1 Timothy 2:12; 3:1-13). Men and women are to fulfill their respective roles. God has called men to exercise their headship in a loving, gentle, respectful, and honoring manner (Eph. 5:25ff; 1 Peter 3:7). He likewise has called women to submit to that headship in a willing, gentle, respectful, and honoring way (Eph. 5:24, 33; 1 Peter 3:1-2). They are to carry their roles in a godly manner in their everyday situations. Unfortunately, many forces are working against them that must be overcome, and the antidote is found in the revealed Word of God (His grace), which instructs both men and women how to live soberly, righteously, and godly in this present world (Titus 2:11-14).
The apostolic teachings instruct men to be the male leaders in the church. They insist on men being the primary leaders in the church just as in marriage and exclude women from that role (1 Timothy 2:12). God has given man and woman different roles in their leadership of the church. God demands men to be godly leaders with godly commitments; faithful to the church; faithful to their wives; faithful to their neighbors, and faithful to the children God has charged them with. God also commands men to be godly in their conduct, understanding the need for a good reputation, the nature of their calling, and the necessity of a godly and righteous life. God wants men to be godly in their character, pursuing righteousness, sanctification, and holiness. They must be men with godly convictions, devoted only to the Truth, diligent in teaching and instructing others in godliness and righteousness. Male leadership is vital for the success of any organization. The home and the church are no exceptions. Godly men are to be mature in godly leadership, mature in their integrity of life, mature in Christ, mature in their knowledge of the Scriptures, mature in their ministry. They are to provide and protect, feed and lead, teach, and tend to the spiritual needs of their family and the church. God demands that the man be responsible spiritually to Him, his wife, his children, his finances, himself (emotionally, physically, psychologically), his friends, neighbors, and the Lord's church.
Today, our society and our nation are in crisis due to men abandoning their God-given role of manhood and fatherhood. They have ignored the notion of being responsible both spiritually and physically for the well-being of those around them, those God has entrusted to them. Men used to be more active members of the church, the home, and their community. Fathers labored hard to instill principles of righteousness in their children, obedience, and respect toward God and all forms of authority. Men were once more active in their sons' education. Today they have given that responsibility to a public school system dominated mostly by female teachers and feminine learning patterns. Men then began to look at social reform and mercy movements as women's work, and, in time, they were the objects of that social reform. For over 150 years, our men have walked out of their God-given role and moral and spiritual leadership responsibilities in their homes, schools, and Bible instruction or counsel. By the end of the 19th century, it was acceptable by our society for men not to be involved with their families. The majority of our little boys and little girls continued under the supervision and authority of ladies until they reached maturity. Nothing in the history of mankind (crusades, wars, migrations, pestilence, etc.) has ever before taken such a large percentage of young and older adult males out of the family context for so much of the walking life of our children.
Consider the sobering statistics: One of every four American children has no father in the home to welcome them at their time of birth. Only 41 percent of today's children will grow up in a two-parent family. Almost a million children are left with just one parent due to divorce. Nine out of ten of these children are with their mothers only. Today's children believe that divorce and separation are a normal part of family life. Indeed, there is a significant father absence, and it is the curse of our day. Such absence has dramatic consequences on our children, especially our sons. The lack of the father's presence indeed damages their son's self-esteem and confidence. Moreover, the absence of male role models at home is also associated with the lack of male role models in schools. Did you know that 95 percent of elementary school teachers are women? Add to that a system that stubbornly insists that our little boys learn as if they were little girls.
So, what is causing our young people, especially our boys, to commit so much lawlessness and crime in our nation? The common factor is the absence of fathers. Fatherless families degenerate boys into far more delinquency and personality disorders than normal or motherless families. Indeed, there is a significant plague of missing fathers in our nation and society. Our boys are confused about their identity and under a great deal of psychological stress and frustration. Our land is increasingly filled with angry, frustrated, and isolated young men who no longer know who they are. In their desperation, they are destroying everything in sight. The majority are victims of substance abuse and murder. Many of them commit suicide each year. This is alarming!
Absent and disinterested fathers also have a significant effect on their daughters. Fathers play a crucial role in the development of their girls' image of femininity. Dad's positive feedback is vital. Their dad's lack of attention leads these girls to believe they are dull and unintelligent, leaving them with little self-esteem. These girls are forced to seek male attention from other places. Usually, they end up finding men who victimize them and take advantage of their need for male approval. Each year three-quarters of a million teenage girls become pregnant in our nation. Half of them will have to deal with an unwanted pregnancy and thus take the life of their unborn baby. Many of these girls are trying to compensate for affection that should have come from their Dad. I grieve to submit that our nation's children are lost!! This reminds me of the nation of Israel's darkest hour in its history. The land was polluted by greed, oppressors, robbery, falsehood, adultery, and murder. The fathers of the nation had failed in their responsibilities. Hosea summed up this tragic situation like this:
"My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge. Because you have rejected knowledge, I also will reject you from being My priest. Since you have forgotten the law of your God, I also will forget your children" (Hosea 4:6).Our society has divorced itself from heaven and God's kingdom of righteousness. Our fathers have ceased to model their fatherhood after the Fatherhood of God. Unless fathers return from the exile of self-serving behavior and start offering their souls to the mercy of our Father in heaven, there is no hope for our nation's children. Our nation's fathers must come to know God as the Father and see His Fatherhood as their pattern. They must reconnect their earthly fatherhood with the heavenly model to function and heal the hearts of their children. They must return to godly and responsible fatherhood (John 5:19). When we look at our Father, we see One who models, and a Son who could declare, "He who has seen me has seen the Father" (John 14:19). Christ is the image of the Father. Our view of God will determine our view of man, the essence of all fatherhood and family life. A better understanding of the Godhead (Father, Son, and Holy Spirit) can solve all of man's critical questions regarding roles, functions, and equality.
"Run to and fro through the streets of Jerusalem, look and take note! Search her squares to see if you can find a man, one who does justice and seeks truth." (Jeremiah 5:1)
I. WHAT DOES IT MEAN TO BE A GODLY MAN OR A REAL MAN?
Before I start with the characteristics of what makes a "real man" a "godly man," I would like to start with the definition of what godliness is and what it means to be godly. According to Strong and Thayer's Greek definition, to be godly means to be pious, 2 Timothy 3:12. It conveys the idea of a personal attitude toward God that results in actions that are pleasing to Him. Godliness is more than just character. It is the character that springs from a devotion to God. True devotion to God always results in godly character. When someone declares that a man is pious, he is saying he is godly, and it is seen in his daily life. To be a devout man is to be a Cornelius as in Acts 10 or an Abraham. Such a man did that which was well-pleasing to God. Godliness is fear or reverence toward God. The Psalmist wrote,
"Praise the LORD! How blessed is the man who fears the LORD, Who greatly delights in His commandments. 2 His descendants will be mighty on earth; The generation of the upright will be blessed. 3 Wealth and riches are in his house, And his righteousness endures forever. 4 Light arises in the darkness for the upright; He is gracious and compassionate and righteous. 5 It is well with the man who is gracious and lends; He will maintain his cause in judgment. 6 For he will never be shaken; The righteous will be remembered forever. 7 He will not fear evil tidings; His heart is steadfast, trusting in the Lord. 8 His heart is upheld, he will not fear, Until he looks with satisfaction on his adversaries. 9 He has given freely to the poor, His righteousness endures forever; His horn will be exalted in honor. 10 The wicked will see it and be vexed, He will gnash his teeth and melt away; The desire of the wicked will perish" (Psalm 112).
Indeed, a godly man's heart is upheld; he will not fear. The blessed man of this Psalm is one whose heart is "fixed," "established." It is a heart that is resolved to a distinct purpose in life. All great men of God have been men of strong resolution. For instance, Abraham searched for a city whose builder and maker was God (Heb. 11:10). The apostle Paul was resolved to press on and move forward and do "one thing..." Our Lord Jesus, who said, "I came to do Thy will O God." Even earthly men, those with a firm resolution of heart, are the ones who succeed. Christian men are no different. They, too, must resolve to have the mind of Christ (Phil. 2:5). So, what does a godly man resolve to do? He considers three characteristics are his resolve: To be sound in faith, be holy in his life, and be a faithful servant of Christ in His kingdom of righteousness.
II. SHOW THYSELF A MAN: ACT LIKE MEN
"Be on the alert, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong. 14 Let all that you do be done in love" (1 Corinthians 16:13-14).So, what is involved for a man ( a Christian man) to show himself as a real man? The answer to this question is found in God's Word, which instructs men on how they ought to conduct themselves. In Timothy 4:12, Christian men are instructed to be examples to those who believe in speech, conduct, love, faith, and purity. We also learn from this Scripture how young men, single men ought to act. And though this passage is talking to Timothy, I believe the same principles apply to all men, young and old. In Colossians 4:6, we are exhorted to let our speech be always with grace, seasoned with salt, that all may know how to answer each other. A Christian man must never compromise with vulgarity. Timothy was also instructed to be an example of love. When a man is full of love, he will not leave any room for hate, bitterness, and angry words. As a Christian man, he must conduct himself in a pleasing way to God, and that includes love. Timothy was to be an example in spirit, faith, and purity. All Christian men must be compelled to live their lives in holiness so that others might see the beauty of Christ, His Spirit in them. It will require faith in God. A Christian man (a godly man, a real man) will watch carefully how he conducts himself around women and maintains pure thoughts. All Christian men are to act in such a way as to be good examples to those around them (Titus 2:6-8).
- Characteristics of a Real Man, a Godly Man as Found in I Corinthians 16:13-14:
Let us analyze in-depth what a "real man" or "godly man" looks like.
- He would be a man "on the alert." He is aware that he has to watch with extreme vigilance his own soul and the souls of those whom he loves to protect them. He will be watchful and careful. He knows that we are engaged in a spiritual war against a cunning and dangerous enemy.
- He is to "stand firm in the faith." He knows that he can succeed in standing firm only if he completely surrenders to God, obeying Him with all of his heart, soul, and mind. He surrenders to God's wisdom and not to worldly wisdom.
- "Act like men." He shows himself as a real man in Christ. He labors intensely to prove himself worthy of God, courageous in his steadfastness and his judgment. He will not compromise his principles as cowards do.
- "Be strong." He is strong. His eyes are fixed on Jesus, and he will not release his grip. He trusts in His God with all of his strength, heart, soul, and mind.
- "Let all that you do be done in love." He knows that all he does in word and deed must be done in a spirit of love toward God and toward his neighbor. He shines his light before all men.
I Corinthians 16:13-14 is very clear about how men are to behave before God. They are to act like real men; they are to be responsible; they are to be grounded in their faith; they are to show strength in every area of their life; they are to do all things in the spirit of Christian love. This is the only way that we will have effective fathers, husbands, leaders in the church, and lights to a dying world of darkness. This is what motivates a man to godliness and manliness.
- So, How Does a Real Man, Godly Man Act As a Husband?
"Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her, 26 so that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27 that He might present to Himself the church in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she would be holy and blameless. 28 So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself; 29 for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ also does the church" (Ephesians 5:25-29).
A real man loves his wife just as Christ loved the church. Think for a moment how deep this love must be. Christ was willing to die for the church, His bride. This is how much love Jesus has for you and me. He was willing to give up his heavenly abode to become man and to live like one of us; be tempted like one of us so that He could fully know how to help us in our time of need (Phil. 2:5-8; 2 Cor. 8:9; Heb. 4:14-16). You see, Jesus, our Lord, was willing to give everything up so that we could be set free from the bondage of sin. He loved us so much that He was willing to submit to such a humiliating death on the cross for our sake (Romans 5:7-9). He purchased the church with His own blood (Acts 20:28). This is how much He loved His bride, the church, and so must husbands love their wives with every ounce of their being. Husbands are to love their wives and nurture them as they would want to be nurtured. Husbands are to love their wives with respect, honor, attention, and affection. Husbands must spend quality time with their wives, rendering care and affection to them (1 Cor. 7:3-5). Based on this Scripture, men must not neglect their wives because Satan will surely have an open door to tempt either the man or the woman. A husband must render the affection his wife deserves.
According to 1 Peter 3:7, husbands are to live wisely with understanding, giving honor to their wives as to the weaker vessel because they are heirs together of the grace of life. So that their prayers are not hindered.
- How Does a Real Man Act As a Father?
"Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord" (Eph. 6:4).
All fathers must provoke their children to righteousness and not wrath. A real man trains up his children in God's Word. He is the spiritual leader of his house, his family. He takes an active part in the teaching and instruction of his children concerning the Lord. God demands that fathers be involved in the upbringing of their children. He does not demand such a role of the schools, the government, or the church. Every Christian man who wants to act like a real man must heed God's instructions about the training of his children (Joshua 24:15; Deut. 5:6-7). Christian men are to act like men, servants of God, and faithful children of God. Real men of God love the Lord, their family, and the church. God wants Christian men to show themselves as real, manly men (brave, determined, matured, leader). He wants men to show what they are made of. So, those who show themselves to be real men are confident in their goals. They know it is worth reaching it. Being a real man is purposed. It does not happen accidentally. To be a real man is what all men must do. It is what every father must be teaching his sons.
A real man, a godly man, leads his family (Gen. 3:16; Eph. 5:23). He knows it is a command from his God. He leads with love as described in 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 and Ephesians. 5:25. He shows compassion toward others (James 2:15-16). He shows hospitality (Gal. 6:10). He leads with honesty, integrity, and diligence. He observes, delights in God's ways (Prov. 23:26). He knows his children are watching his manner of life. He is the manager and head of his family. He makes wise choices for his family. He is responsible for the well-being of his household. He loves, protects, provides, and points them to Christ in godliness (Deut. 6:7; Eph. 6:4) and provides spiritual nourishment and leadership (Joshua 24:15). Often, the father who fails to lead his family spiritually has children who become unfaithful and ungodly as they grow up. A godly man, husband, and father leads his family in worship that is consistent with the Word of God. He makes sure his children are worshiping God in Spirit and Truth (John 4:24). He reinforces the importance of worship in the daily lives of his family. He serves God faithfully and cheerfully (Col. 3:17, 23). He encourages his children to serve by being an example of servitude to others. He instills steadfastness and faithfulness in his children. He is aware that without works, his faith is dead. So he leads his family daily in prayer and Bible study (Eph. 6:4). As he spends time reading and studying the Word of God, he understands that he needs to apply it in his daily life. He teaches his children to pray. He leads his family soberly in holiness, righteousness, and godliness before the world (Titus 2:11).
So, fathers, remember that as real men, godly fathers, you must be the right example before your children. God demands that of you (Matt. 5:13-16; 1 Tim. 4:13). Your godly example speaks louder than words. Remember, you must be the leader in your home. Under no circumstances are you to abandon your God-ordained role as the head of your home. You must continue in your father's role. You must lead your family in church attendance, Bible study, prayer, and all spiritual activities. These are not women's work. Godly father, you must be the right kind of man, practicing love in the home and rejoicing in your children (Psalm 127:3-5). You are to be meek and not weak. You are to be pure in a lawless society. A godly father will avoid, at all cost, anything that would pollute his home. Though you are not perfect, you must sincerely seek to lead your children to heaven. May your tribe increase!
- A Real or Godly Man Stands For Truth And Righteousness:
He is sound in his faith and is free from error (Titus 1:13). He opposes all error, all that is against the Truth. He knows he cannot stand for Truth without standing firm against all error. He opposes error and all falsehood because he stands for the Truth (Psalm 119:104). The godly man stands for Jesus' authority. He acknowledges well that Jesus is the head over all things to the church (Eph. 1:22); Jesus has all authority in heaven and earth (Matt. 8:28). Thus he, the godly man, stands against all human tradition as his rule of authority. He is resolved to stand for the inspired Truth, which contains no error. He opposes modernism of every kind, humanism, and everything that is against God's will. He stands firm for the Lord's church, which He built (Matt. 16:18) and purchased with His own blood (Acts 20:28). The godly man stands for the Gospel plan of salvation that requires men to believe, repent, confess Jesus as Son of God, and be baptized for the forgiveness of sins. Thus he opposes all religious error such as "faith alone" because it denies God's plan. He stands only for the authorized worship rather than rituals, innovations, and new forms of emotional satisfaction. He fights tooth and nail for the souls of men. He is indeed, by his godly behavior, a sound man in the faith.
- A Real Man, a Godly Man, is Resolved to be Holy in His life:
- A Real Man is Faithful (Devoted) in His Service to God:
- The Man Who Seeks to be Godly Before God Pursues the Right Priorities and Loves What is Good Defined by God, (Phil. 4:8):
Therefore, he is diligent in teaching sound doctrine, healthy teaching against false, weak, and sickly teaching which contradicts, opposes (by compromise, opposition, or neglect) the Truths of God. He is both a defender and teacher, preacher and physician in that he consistently takes up the task to comfort, confront, admonish and expose false teachings, half gospels, and deceptive messages of false teachers. Hence, he knows that to take up such an assignment from God, his life and his message must be in harmony with the will of God.
CONCLUSION:
A real, godly man is a proclaimer of God's Truth. He is the head of his wife and leads with love and honor; he is prince in his home but not domineering; he professes love even when silent; he prioritizes but is not reclusive; he is possessive but not possessing; he is a godly husband and is loyal to his wife; he honors his wife. He respects and esteems her by the way he treats her. He lives with her according to his understanding of her strengths and weaknesses (I Peter 3:7). He provides for his wife's needs, both physically, spiritually, and intimately (I Tim. 5:8; I Cor. 7:1-4; I Peter 3:7). He is a blessing from God in the marriage relationship. He loves his wife as God loves the church by sacrificing, loving her as he loves his own body, genuinely caring for her (Eph. 5:25-33). He follows the perfect pattern of love toward his wife (I Cor. 13:4-8). He provides for the needs of his children and brings them up in the admonition of the Lord (I Tim. 5:8; Eph. 6:1-4). He teaches his children respect for authority, older people, and the law. Likewise, he teaches his children to love work, use their money wisely, the sanctity of marriage, and the importance of serving the Lord faithfully. He does not belittle and provoke his children to wrath, making unreasonable demands (Eph. 6:4).
A godly man sets the right example for his family and others with love, respect, and understanding (2 Cor. 3:2-3; Eph. 5:22-23; 4:32). He is an example in the church (attendance, worship, Bible study, prayer, and righteousness, 2 Tim. 2:15; Titus 2:11-12). He guards his heart and is pure; he is devoted to God first; he is merciful; he is a protector; he loves God's principles of righteousness because he loves God and His Word. He knows God's Word will help him to conduct himself as a child of God in his family (I Timothy 3:15). He also thinks and behaves in a manner worthy of the Gospel that will not bring shame to God (I Peter 1:16). He knows he is to crucify the old man of sin and become more like Jesus in His righteousness (Romans 6:1-4; II Cor. 5:17). He acknowledges that he has been bought by the blood of Jesus and is expected to give his life completely to the Lord in service. He knows he belongs to the Lord, and his life is no longer to do the will of the flesh, but rather to do the will of the Lord (I Corinthians 6:19;-20; Phil 3:12-15; Matt 16:24).
A real man, a godly man, focuses primarily on spiritual things (Col. 3:1-4). He knows he is to do the good works of His Father such as teaching others by word and example: encouraging others, correcting error, and providing assistance for the material and spiritual needs of others (Titus 2:14; Eph. 2:10; James 5:16; Gal. 6:1-2; Eph. 4:28). He knows he must live godly with contentment (Titus 2:11-12; I Tim. 6:6). Godly in his marriage (Eph. 5:25); godly toward his children (Eph. 6:1-4); godly in his work (Col. 3:22-24); godly in government (Rom. 13:6-7); godly in bodily discipline (I Tim. 4:8); godly in material and financial matters, (Romans 13:8); and finally he is to be godly while he is walking here on earth (I John 2:15-17; I Peter 2:11-12).
Moreover, he is to be mature in Christ by bearing good fruit (Gal. 5:22); by adding excellence to his faith (2 Peter 1:5-9); by studying God's Word and being rooted in it (2 Tim. 2:15; I Peter 2:1-2); and by putting into practice the principles of righteousness (Heb. 5:14). He knows that work is honorable (Gen. 2:15). He is aware that God hates the disorderly man who refuses to work and provide for his needs and for the needs of those he loves (2 Thess. 3:6-13; I Tim. 5:4, 8). He knows he must labor intensely unto the Lord and not men (Eph. 6:5-8; Col 3:22-25; Eph. 4:28).
A real man, a godly man, loves God's church in deed and Truth (I John 3:17-18). He provides them with the things they need ( James 2:14-17). He knows that if he does not love his brethren, He does not love God (I John 4:20). He is careful with worldly friendships, worldly habits, and everything that corrupts him (I Cor. 15:33). He knows he needs righteous friends to be strong and holy (Rom. 15:1); he helps those who are found in sin with meekness and humility of heart (Gal. 6:1). He also knows how to build and maintain relationships since he knows well how to apply and follow the "golden rule" (Matt. 7:1). This will help him eliminate causes of strife, hate, anger, a contentious spirit, foolish talk, and meddling. He is very watchful about what he says to others or how he expresses himself (Prov. 25:11; James 3:2-12).
He regards others as God does. That means he loves his enemies (Matt. 5:43-48; Romans 12:17-21). He follows the example of Jesus (Luke 23:34). He teaches the lost and the saved with meekness, love, and longsuffering (I Tim. 2:4; 2 Tim. 2:2). He is sober-minded, discreet, well-balanced, and able to make sound decisions on any matter with wisdom and understanding (I Tim. 3:2; Titus 1:8). This means he is mentally alert, always knowing what is going on, working with all his might for the success of the Lord's church. He is temperate, meaning self-controlled in everything (I Tim. 3:2). He controls his temper, his foolish anger. He is a man of good behavior. He is orderly (I Tim. 3:2). This implies that he is decent, modest, honorable in his appearance and conduct. He is not clownish, rude, crude, sour, boisterous, and disgraceful. A man of God who rules in His kingdom must be dignified, courteous, chaste, honest, fair, diligent, kind, polite in speech, not sour, nor cutting, clean and moderate in all his habits. In a few words, he is a well-behaved man in all phases and manners of his life.
He is gentle and patient (I Tim. 3:3). This implies that he is meek, lowly, and considerate. He is a lover of good and holds fast to what is good. He does not strike back at anyone who disagrees with him or displeases him (I Tim. 3:3; Titus 1:7). He does not attain money or riches dishonestly by abusing others (Titus 1:7). He is not quarrelsome. He abstains from battling both physically and verbally (I Tim. 3:3). He is not covetous, nor is he a lover of money and self (I Tim. 3:3). He is not given to wine and lawlessness (I Tim. 3:3; Titus 1:7). He hates all evil, sin (Titus 1:8, Micah 6:8; Rom. 12:9). He is just, righteous, and upright (Titus 1:8). He is holy, free from all lawlessness and wrong. One who observes all of God's commands is pure in heart toward all men. He knows he must be holy because God is HOLY (I Peter 1:16). A real, godly man is not self-willed, self-absorbed, selfish, and arrogant; he is not inconsiderate, arrogantly asserting his own will. He is not presumptuous, demanding his own rights (Titus 1:7); he is not quick-tempered, getting very angry all the time (Titus 1:7, James 1:19-20).
Therefore, a real man, a godly man's primary goal, is to become an elder and serve the needs of the congregation. He will be eligible if he meets all of the above qualities or characteristics. This will qualify him and provide a heritage for perhaps future elders from his descendants. Wouldn't that be a blessing in the kingdom of Christ?!
Our homes and churches are in so much need of these godly men of God. Men who diligently want to seek God's counsel and Truth in every area of their lives. It is such a tragedy to see the breakdown of the family, especially the role of the head of the household, due to no-fault divorce, out-of-wedlock childbearing, materialism, and individualism. The breakdown of the home reflects a lack of respect for the Bible as the Word of God by allowing our culture to redefine what God has divinely instituted. It will take a lot of strength and courage to stop the tide of our culture.
Throwing more money at government programs will not help lower divorce rates, children born out of wedlock, or the vast majority of children who live in a house without a father. The answer is not in strengthening our economy, the military, and our public education system. The answer is in men wanting to be godly men, real men who seek righteousness and Truth. We need real men who will not abandon their covenant of marriage and their children. We need real, godly men like Abraham, Joshua, Job, Jonadab, Elkanah, and others like them. Moreover, we need fathers who will turn their own hearts to their children and the hearts of their children to their fathers as well as to God.
May the Lord help our brothers in Christ be real and godly men and fulfill the great need that godliness provides. May each and every father rule the little corners of God's kingdom honorably and well. May they keep their eyes fixed on Him alone and His Word. May they seek wisdom to faithfully persevere in their God-given role of fatherhood. May each father never forget his dependence on the Heavenly Father to fulfill his role as prince in his home.
I would like to conclude with a few words of exhortation from Titus 2:12; Proverbs 22:6, and a poem I have written myself.
I would like to conclude with a few words of exhortation from Titus 2:12; Proverbs 22:6, and a poem I have written myself.
"For the grace of God that bringeth salvation hath appeared to all men, 12 Teaching us that, denying ungodliness and worldly lusts, we should live soberly, righteously, and godly, in this present world."
"Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it."
Oh, Blessed Fatherhood!
By Luci Y. Partain
More than words could ever say,
A godly father loves his child
For his heart leads like the Shepherd’s
As he leads the righteous way.
For he knows he shall give an account
To his heavenly Father, above one day.
For the way, he molds that life he holds…
As a yielding and pliable piece of clay.
With tender loving care, he trains,
He does not spare his shepherd’s rod,
For a closer walk with God;
He prays each and every day
For he knows his child learns more
By the example he observes,
Than what he hears from one grown cold…
And instructions he receives.
For a godly father knows his days
Are limited with this clay;
For he must fashion it
While it’s still tender and pliable,
He knows he must shape it God’s way;
For he knows one day, he must depart for glory,
And will leave behind footprints in his child's heart
To trace and find his place…
In that sublime and great kingdom of Christ
Luci
