Early in my walk with Christ, I learned that PURITY means more than simply avoiding fornication. PURITY, like other virtues, begins in the heart. The Bible calls it CHASTITY. It doesn't always mean "ABSTINENCE." Married women are exhorted to be chaste, "To be sensible, PURE, workers at home, kind, being subject to their husbands, that the word of God may not be DISHONORED." Titus 2:5. "As they observe your CHASTE, and RESPECTFUL behavior. " I Peter 3:2.
Being CHASTE is more than a physical state, it is an active virtue that continually exhibits PURITY in thought, word and deed. It demands that I honor the estate of marriage and the marriage bed. It goes beyond avoiding FORNICATION. In fact, it is far more active, since it involves loving my brother in Christ enough to help protect his chastity as well. "For the whole Law is fulfilled in one word, in the statement, "You shall love your neighbor as yourself." Galatians 5:14. I am commanded by the Lord to honor marriage, whether it is my marriage or my neighbor's marriage. "Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled for fornicators and adulterers God will judge." Hebrews 13:4.
As mothers we have an enormous responsibility to protect and train our daughters when it comes to chastity. We are our daughters' example. As they are growing up into young ladies, they are watching us. They are trying to find out how to become godly. If my daughters see me dressing provocatively with clothes that reveal or accentuate what should be very private, or perhaps, putting on clothes that are skin tight or low cut to attract the attention of men, then they are likely to follow my example. Let's be good examples to them and not stumbling blocks. Our little girls want to be just like their mothers! What an honor! Please, let's make sure we are pointing them to Christ: "Be imitators of me, just as I also am of Christ." I Corinthians 11:1.
Dads are not off the hook! Dads, do you know your daughters are watching and listening to you also? If their hero, daddy, is attracted to sensuality in other women, they will likely become this kind of woman. Our sons also learn this kind of behavior. They notice what kind of movies, entertainment, books, magazines and so on that their dads are engaged in. These boys are observing what their dads value most in women and this is critical because eventually they will be affected by whether or not Dad respects, protects or is faithful and honors their Mom.
Jesus said that everyone who looks at a woman to lust for her has committed ADULTERY with her already in his heart, "but I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart." Matthew 5:28.. Men must take this seriously. They must take this to heart! They need to learn to guard their eyes as Job did. "I have made a covenant with my eyes; how then could I gaze at a virgin?" Job 31:1.
Now with this is mind we, as women, can make it easy or difficult for men around us. The choice is ours! It has been said that just as men have the sinful tendency to lust after women; likewise, many women have the same tendency to lust after being lusted after. Notice how the married woman of Proverbs 7 was not actually a harlot. She plainly dressed like one. The motives of her heart were to entice a young man: "And behold, a woman comes to meet him, dressed as a harlot and cunning of heart." Proverbs 7:10. However, there are women who perhaps because they are naive, dress in a way that's provocative without any sinful intention. Still, remember the old saying, "Don't advertise what is not for sale!"
Unfortunately, many times a woman's pride or insecurity causes her to dress immodestly in order to be noticed, "Likewise, I want women to adorn themselves with PROPER clothing, MODESTLY and DISCREETLY...." I Timothy 2:9. One thing I know for sure is that men are easily affected by the way we dress, carry ourselves and behave.
So often, it is our young women who are not aware of the effect they have on men. So it is up to us, the older women in their lives, mainly their mothers, to teach and train them. As women who profess godliness, we are to glorify God by communicating to others what Biblical beauty is all about. Beauty is NOT sensuality, in the way we dress and carry ourselves. It is our DUTY to our brothers in Christ not to appear sensual! "For you were called to freedom, brethren, only DO NOT turn your freedom into an OPPORTUNITY to the flesh, but through love serve one another." Galatians 5:13.
If I dress and carry myself in a way that is to entice another sister or woman's husband, the fact is, I am not loving my brothers in Christ and their wives. My goal is to save my body, physically and visually, ONLY for my own husband. My obligation as a godly mother is to teach my daughters to save their bodies PURE for their future husbands, as well as to love their brothers in Christ enough to not cause them to stumble.
In my second part, I wish to consider the question "Is frumpier holier?" or can CHASTITY be feminine and beautiful?
Luci
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